Why is Paris Hilton in the doghouse lately? (ruff ruff!) Ha ha, just kidding, not the celebrity nooz hound doghouse! Gross!
But seriously, why? Don’t the police have anything better to do than pull over totally awesome celebs who have been drinking? I guess not! Ouch, that is Paris’ pain, and it is my own pain now! Ooo, it hurts!
Look at this, she’s so stressed she’e even talking into her radical superstar Blackberry phone backwards!
See the awesome radical buttons? But whatevah, I don’t like how people always make fun of Paris, ever since that awesome nature movie she made of the animals with glow in the dark eyes making all the weird sounds! She’s so smart and loves the environment!
Paris Hilton gets a bad rap. And not like Kevin Federline is a bad rapper! Whoah, snap! Awesome guitar solo!