Ta-da! Thanks to some amaaaaaaaaazing under-cover noozin’ (double ruff!) we just got the scoop on where celebs are hangin these days! You know how whe you go to restaurants with your dad or whatever and sometimes bars and there aren’t any celebrities there? And you’re like “Why can’t we go somewhere that doesn’t smell like grandma’s and there are clothes on the girls who are walking around with drinks and stuff?” Well, its because they have a way awesomer place to hang out that no one knows about because its like a SUPAH SECRET! DUH! And also they don’t have to deal with their dads, which is totes uncool.
Celebs aren’t hanging at the mall anymore because there aren’t any cool clothes ever since The Limited left and went to that place by the gas station. Its true! They loooved that store. Now all the ultrah kewl celebrities are hangin’ at the Hospital! Its where all the nooz goes down!
Word is that she’s cheating on her losah boyfriend with a really coo bartender there. Its true! Bummer
THIS JUST IN: Nicole Richie is fighting the terroristic war! Awesome right? NOT! She’s on the wrong side!
Ruff! Ruff! Tom Crooz could use some toothpaste! Why does he have his hand up like that? Is he behind a glass window so no one can get to him?
FYI you guys, same source told us that there’s something crazy brewing! Can you guess what Tom Crooz, Katie Holmes and The Moon have in common? Find out after the jump!
Paris Hilton, we heard you didn’t even sing the totally awesome songs on your new album “Paris”! Can it be true? Puuuhhleeaze say it’s not!
We heard you got some losah from California who’s in some other band to sing for you! Why would you do this, when your voice is like such a sweet songbird! FYI, us nooz hounds (arf! arf!) have pretty sweet singing voices when we’re not growling and digging up bones (scoops) in the backyard! What is the deal? We tried to find out who it was , but we googled “losah from California” and all we got was this:
BREAKING: One of our super scoopers (ruff!) just told us that Lindsay has been up to something fishy. Uh oh!
Ultra top secret footage below. For eyes only: